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lyrics

The best time of the day
Is five before breakfast
A cheeky snifter
Puts the wind in my sails
I leave my cornflakes
To go a little soggy
As I stagger to the letterbox
To pick up the mail

It's rum o clock!
Rum's the greatest of the nouns
Janice! Grab your frock
And we can go out on the town

The best time of the day
Is ten after dinner
Dried gravy on my chin
The combination's such a winner
I pour it over pudding
It's better than the custard
And helps Edward to deal
With all the sober bastards

It's rum o clock!
I live for this moment
I'd lick it off the floor
If the bottle got broken

The best time of the day
Is just before bed
Unwinding on the chaise
And feeling so well fed
This liquid diet
Is the best that I've found
You weight watchers should try it
You'll lose all of the pounds

It's rum o clock!
Yes, dears!
It's rum o clock!
Did you hear?
It's rum o clock
All day and all night long

The best time of the day
Is the moment of waking
I reach for the bottle
It's there for the taking
But in my state I'd forgotten
It was empty before bed
So what is this liquid
I'm drinking instead?
Oh bugger, oh blast
Now I remember
I needed to whizz at three and a quarter
Oh damn it, oh blerrrgh
I've come over all giddy
I must be imbibing my own wee!

It's pee o clock
Oh damn it, oh skid-a-lee-dee!
Where is my rum?
The decanter is empty
Oh bugger! Oh bum!
I need to go down to the Tesco
Post haste
To get some more of the rum
And rinse my mouth, of this disgusting taste

credits

from The Edward Show Musics Album (Comedy Songs), released September 5, 2018

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Pete Murphy Birmingham, UK

Pete Murphy, UK songwriter. I make unpopular music in numerous styles... everything recorded, performed, mixed, and mastered by me in a tiny corner of the lounge in my house. Avant pop, experimental, electronic, techno, solo jazzy piano, techno jazz, rock, musicals, sound art, comedy, and more... ... more

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